In another universe – a dark, terrible one – the Republican Party has achieved something remarkable. They’ve found a way to take bullshit to bold, new heights every single day. Just by opening their mouths. Whatever the serious problem facing America, the Republican response to it is guaranteed to be gibberish. Yet another military assault weapon-wielding mass murderer of school children? “We need more guns!” The overwhelming majority of Americans want women to have control of their bodies (and health CARE to go with it)? “Let’s criminalize having a womb”. Donald Trump is demonstrably a criminal? “Make America great again”. Welcome to Republican Magical Thinking – where Ooga meets Booga.

Our problem isn’t just that Republicans gave up on American democracy, they gave up on the Truth, too.

The Democracy Crap Shoot

The more the GOP became a white, Christian nationalist party, the more compelled they became to destroy democracy. Democracy after all is a crap shot where power is concerned. You have to play to the People and hope like hell that the People want to buy what you’re selling.

But, what if the People don’t want what you’re selling? That’s the conundrum facing the GOP. They need to sell America the idea that living in the past will be better than going boldly into the future. The future is uncertain. Change is likely. Uncertainty and change are anathema to conservatives. I’m not judging them – I’m describing them.

What Do Conservatives Want?

Being conservatives, they want to conserve as much of “what was” as possible. And “what was” was a world where white, Christian men controlled everything in America. That’s the America conservatives crave (and cravenly!).

As the “Reagan Revolution” waned, Republicans saw America diversifying far more quickly than they’d expected. And those new, diverse Americans didn’t necessarily want the same things conservatives wanted. If those new, diverse Americans voted in numbers, Republicans feared, Republicans would quickly loose control of whole states they’d controlled forever.

And so, the Republican Party declared war on American democracy. They made gerrymandering and voter suppression part of their election strategy. If you can’t sell your ideas to American voters then prevent American voters from voting; and if they do vote, don’t count their vote.

Where Ooga Meets Booga

When questioned about their anti-democratic behavior, Republicans like Kevin McCarthy fall back on a stream of idiotic talking points: “Taking away assault weapons won’t change anything”… “Life begins at fertilization”… “Religious freedom”… “Donald Trump won the 2020 election!”

To call that rubbish is unkind to rubbish. Do Republicans even really believe this shit? The ones at the top of the heap absolutely don’t. They’re cynical scumbags who’ve stapled-gunned themselves to Donald Trump and they will go down with him. The herd does believe. To them, unfettered belief is everything while actual knowledge is the devil.

They’ve always lived at the intersection of Ooga and Booga. Where bullshit gets treated like truth.

Right now, conservative Republicans (like those in Tennessee) have it in their heads that they can circumvent democracy because democracy is inconvenient. Not to keep kicking Tennessee when it’s down, but, truth has never fared well in that state. Tennessee after all was where school teacher John Scopes went on trial for teaching evolution in his classroom.

Evolution was a (relatively) new idea. The conservatives in Tennessee preferred their ooga booga. Conservatives as a rule still do.